Plain Sugar Please

[wizardplease]

Who| Haruto Soma and you!
What| The donut wizard asked for donuts, and he got them. Lots of them.
Where| Around?
When| Week 3-ish
Warnings/Notes| High in calories?

He had been half-joking, when the little camera had asked him to smile and say what he'd like for a Valentine's Day gift. There were smarter things he could have requested, useful things, but it was so ridiculous a thing to have happen that he just blurted out the first thing he thought of. "Plain sugar donuts! Just plain sugar. No fancy stuff!" It's not like they'd send them raining from the sky just for him. He'd combed through half the Capitol on his own trying to find a satisfactory plain and simple donut and come up empty. The Gamemakers wouldn't be able to do it.

Which is why the first package of donuts to come parachuting gently from the sky was such a surprise. He had been out in the snow, intently checking the amateurish snares that he'd set, when the heard the little chime, and he had acted quickly enough to snatch the delivery right out of the air. Upon popping it open, the first thing he saw, resting gently atop some very pleasant looking donuts, was a note signed '<3 Nitou', and it's just about enough to make him drop the whole thing all over the ground. He sputters, he doubles over, he stifles his laughter... and then pulls one of the donuts from the package, holds it up to the sky in a 'cheers' motion, and takes a big bite. And it is very good. If Nitou is going to keep this game of fan-teasing chicken going, he is alright with it if it means he gets free plain sugar donuts.

It's an hour later that another package of donuts is parachuted in, containing the same note. And then comes another. And another. Eventually Haruto is left sitting on a log, a stack of five donut boxes beside him, his jacket covered in powdered sugar and a dumb grin on his face. He is unable to stifle that laughter any more. If he attracts someone that wants to kill him? Who even cares? He's got donuts. He's good. And he might even be inclined to share them, if asked nicely.

Comments

[hereliestheabyss]

Donuts do not exist in Thedas.

Or if they do, Hawke has never encountered them. They very well could line the shelves of the finest Orlesian pastry shops, for all she knows, likely under a similarly Orlesian name that no one can pronounce and touted as tasting of despair or something else equally pretentious. But she has seen no such baked goods in Ferelden or Kirkwall alike, not once, and that is a crying shame. A situation that must be rectified immediately.

The trail of laughter is hardly subtle. Makes Hawke see why so many people keep telling her to be quiet in the arena— Not that seeing the reasoning in action gives her any inclination to listen, of course. What it does inspire in her is a curiosity that can only be quenched by investigating the source. There’s not exactly much to laugh about, given the surroundings, and that makes any source of happiness all the odder and ripe for opportunity.

She creeps towards the log as soundlessly as the snow will allow, eyes the boxes with scrutiny, and pops up behind Haruto without any given warning, squatting on her knees and balancing on the balls of her feet.

“Well, well. What have you got there?”

[wizardplease]

If there really is a pastry shop in some world that claims to be selling Despair Donuts, Haruto is going to have to go and find a way to have words with them. Donuts bring hope, as far as he's concerned. That's the right and natural order of the universe, wherever that universe might be.

But back in the moment... all this time being an enormous killjoy towards his friends and district-mates about keeping it down, and he's the one that keeps making too much noise and getting crept up on. It figures. The moment Hawke makes herself known he gives a shout, jolts, and tosses the donut he's currently working on up in the air. And then he's up and grabbing for it and securing it again, because donuts are very important.

"What th.... you!" His shock is already fading, and any anger is gone and replaced with amusement. He liked Hawke, and they were from the same District. Nothing to worry about, here. "They're donuts. You want one? My valentine sent me a whole pile of them." At that little quip he looks skywards and gives his eyebrows a waggle. There have got to be cameras on this. Might as well play it up. Maybe he'll get a sixth box.

[hereliestheabyss]

If donuts are the first bout of culture shock Hawke experiences over the course of the conversation, the concept of valentines comes as a close second. The joys of hailing from a world lacking modern amenities. “You’re assuming I know what those are. You know what they say about assuming.” At least wordplay is a universal constant. Unlike her ignorance towards the society of Earth as a whole, making an ass of anyone brings her actual joy. “How about this. You explain, and I eat. Start with whichever one had you laughing so hard, the donuts or the valentine.”

She reaches for one, and once it’s in hand she holds it up to look at Haruto through the hole instead of eating it right away, contrary to her claim. What can she say? It’s an intriguing shape, reminding her vaguely of a monocle or magnifying glass, and receiving clarification on the pasty can’t hurt before she dives in.

[wizardplease]

"...they say something about assuming?" Culture shock is all over the place in this arena. Despite his fantastic grasp of the local language, his native tongue is still one that can't pull off 'ass' puns of that variety. But he's not going to dwell on it, because there are explanations to give... and there's something charming about her staring at him through a donut hole. It brings a smile back to his face.

"It's a combination of the two. Valentine's Day is a holiday. They do it differently here than in my home country. You give gifts to the person you love." And that's enough to get him stifling some laughter. Either Nitou was messing with him or this whole 'woah man you're a dude I'm not down with that' thing was a great big put-upon act. Both were hilarious. "And donuts are those. They're fried sweet dough, covered in powdered sugar. At least, the best ones are." And he snatches up another for himself, and takes a big bite. That had better be enough explanation for now, because he's still hungry and hasn't had a decent donut in months.

[hereliestheabyss]

“Think about it. Maybe it’ll come to you.” Unfortunately for both parties involved, Hawke misinterprets his ignorance as naivety. It’s an easy conclusion to draw, considering her usual company of doe-eyed elves. The language barrier is just another detail that’s yet to be explained to her in full. All the more miscommunication to fumble over in the future.

The explanation is a thorough one, but it leaves her arching an eyebrow at the one piece of the puzzle left unsolved. “So... Your sweetheart sent you sweet bread. Where’s the joke in that? It’s a funny enough shape, I suppose—” To affirm her point, she opts to stop holding the bestowed donut to her eye and tries to spin it around her finger instead... Which sends sugar flying in her direction. That interrupts her speech well enough, has her spluttering for a second, and she has to wipe at her face with a scowl setting in place from embarrassment before she can continue. Oh, the shame. “But not a laugh out loud sort of funny.”

[wizardplease]

He does think about it, though not for very long. "I'll let you know if I come up with something." It really isn't clicking. Someday, someone will explain it and he will laugh his, uh, ass off. But for now, he is just going to look a bit dim.

And at least she is confused, too. He holds up a finger and opens his mouth, ready to reveal the reason that it's all so funny to him... and then there's sugar everywhere, and he's laughing anyway, clapping a hand briefly over his mouth. "You're supposed to eat them. Stop playing with your food."