you treat me like a stranger [Closed]

[aboveangrybees]

Who| Steve Rogers & 616!Bucky Barnes
What| Backdated ta couple days before Steve dies.
Where| Around town
When| Mid to End of Week 4
Warnings/Notes| Death of Zombie Peggy

Maybe he hadn't realized the level these people would stoop to, the levels of torture they'd enact on people they've already kidnapped and forced into a death match. Yet, they did and he knows he shouldn't have been surprised, but when he saw her stumble from the fog, how could he not be shocked.

She's a shell of the woman he knows, it wasn't hard to figure out it was a trick, that she was fake, but that didn't stop the pain looking at her brought. A reminder of a love that was casualty to choice Steve had to make, to a war that needed to end, a spark lost from his grasp. But that wouldn't be enough for the Gamemakers, something worse was going to happen, these things were at the center of it, yet-

He's tried a number of times to lose her, knowing he couldn't bring himself to kill something with Peggy's face, but she always found her way back to him. Looking at her was a reminder of what he needed to do but couldn't. It made him feel helpless.

Comments

[soldieronwards]

It's getting harder and harder for Bucky to stay at Steve's side here in this arena.

It was almost easy at first--he knows how to tough it in difficult situations, he's been through plenty of them. The war was harsh for everyone, and more than once he, Steve, and whoever they were working with at the time found themselves hungry and hunted in enemy territory. If anything, those first few days were nostalgic.

Even when the Arena turned into hell itself, he didn't let it get him down.

But then Natasha succumbed to the dangers of the Arena, leaving him pierced through with guilt and that sense of failure. Then the little reminders that this isn't the Steve he knows began to pile up--his familiarity with the other unfamiliar Avengers, the momentary pauses when one or the other of the two of them bring up something that the other doesn't remember, everything like that.

Bucky grows hungrier and angrier at everything around him. It's only a matter of time before his cool breaks and he starts lashing out at people around him who are just defending themselves, he knows--

--and then the more familiar version of Steve arrives. The one that is the man he knows...except it isn't. He's silent and his eyes are empty. He's more familiar and less familiar than the Steve that Bucky can actually talk with here. Bucky knows he should just dispatch this imposter before anything worse happens because of it (but what if it really is--? Wouldn't that be even worse, though?), but every time he tries to brace himself to do so, too many memories resurface. The last time he killed someone who looked like Steve Rogers, and the consuming guilt that gnawed at him for months afterwards, even though he'd tried every other way of getting through to the false Captain America and failed (doesn't he always fail?). Worse, the last time he'd so fiercely tried to kill Steve himself.

He avoids the real Steve at first because of it, so for the first day, he doesn't realize that Steve Rogers has also been visited by a solid, silent ghost. On the second day, driven as if mad to avoid his own quiet companion, he seeks out Steve once more. This time, he stops in the shadows not far away, stealthily observing Steve's distressed reaction to that hollow-eyed woman. And something clicks for Bucky.

He can't deal with his own problems, so he'll do what he's always done and take care of Steve's for him.

This time, when Steve does his best to lose this awful version of Peggy Carter, Bucky's there to slip out of the shadows and slide wire around her neck. For some reason, though, it takes longer than he expected for her to die.

It's just because he's tired and hungry, he tells himself as he stands over the body. His right arm is weaker than usual, perhaps; he should have relied more on his left.

It can't be because that terrible shrieking unsettled him. He is too good a trained killer for that.

[aboveangrybees]

It was the last effort to lose her, to have her disappear into the fog and never find him again. And he knew it wouldn't work, it hadn't the handful of times he tried before this one, but he just knew he couldn't kill her, not until whatever trap she was a part of sprung. Then it might be too late.

He knew that risk, so that's why he kept trying to rid himself of her presence.

Then the shrieking cut throught he fog like a knife and straight into him. He knew immediately that god awful almost inhuman noise of distress was coming from that thing and, before he could even think about it, he was running back towards it.

Maybe it was a lingering protectiveness for the woman the thing was mimicking that drove him.

When arriving on the scene, a maelstrom of emotions lodge themselves in his chest at seeing Bucky standing over a dead body made to look like the last woman he loved. His eyes are fixated on her, even as he continues his approach, the expression on his face a calm mix of relief and unsure sadness. He stops to look down at her and he knows this is an image he'll never forget.

Even if Bucky has said something, he doesn't show if he's heard or not, but for the moment, he places a hand on the man's arm, a thank you without words, before he kneels by the remains and moves to close her eyes.

[soldieronwards]

Bucky stands there like a statue. Where before in this Arena Steve saw him distraught and out of control, right now he's completely calm. He just did what he's trained to do, that's all. And he did it for Steve, so it's fine.

There isn't the slightest tremor in him as Steve touches him.

He waits a few moments to speak, giving the other man a little space, a little time. Finally, he says, "There are more of them. No telling what they're planning." All he can do right now is talk about strategy. Not that it's his strong point--but it's better than talking about real feelings at the moment.

[aboveangrybees]

For the moment, he doesn't stand, doesn't move, just looks at this fake Peggy and lets Bucky break the silence. Still, he can't bring himself to look away just yet. A part of him expected he'd one day look down at her in a casket, but an aged woman who's lived her life and aged into death, not young and strangled. He's not fooled by her, but he still can't take this image from his mind.

Strategy, he can do that. It's a distraction from the conflicted way he's feeling right now.

"A trap, my guess is to either attack us after lulling people into feeling secure or unnerving us to the point of lashing out," finally he looks away, but not at anything, just into the fog. "This is psychological more than anything, but still, they're probably going to turn on us eventually."

[soldieronwards]

Bucky, meanwhile, doesn't look at the body at all. It's just a corpse, and he's seen plenty of those. He's made plenty of those, and this one isn't special.

Instead, his gaze is intent on Steve. Watching the other man for any signs of what he's feeling, any hints to how he can be helped.

"You're right," is all he says for now, though. He sticks to strategy. "We don't get things like this for free here. It's best to take them down soon."

For a second, he glances away, into the fog around them. Waiting for his own silent false friend to show up.

[aboveangrybees]

Steve doesn't look at the body again, he can't. Probably would just be easier if he could cover her with his jacket, but he doesn't have it. That's been gone for weeks now. All he can do is keep his gaze away and his attention on more productive things.

So, he stands, stepping away from the body. What hurt that's visible is soon tucked away with the rest, his face falling into something more thoughtful and professional. Being upset over a dead fake Peggy isn't going to help anyone.

"Agreed, but it needs to be handled delicately. Not everyone is going to react well to someone trying to kill a visage of their loved ones," it's just fact, some people are going to react really bad to people butting in.

He notices the glance, looking that direction himself now, then it clicks. Bucky might not have killed his own yet. He looks back to the other man. "Leave it to me," an offer.