thearena | I stole and burnt your soul

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I stole and burnt your soul

Who| Courfeyrac & Cindy
What| Courfeyrac hunts down Cindy, then finds out Marius and Cosette have been killed.
Where| Lower levels
When| Week 4 - Valentine's Day! ♥
Warnings/Notes| Smooches? Also discussion of violence probably.

Another week had passed, and with the arrival of various romantic notes and chocolates into the Arena, Courfeyrac came to realize that it was Valentine's Day. This realization gave him a distraction from the lack of food in his belly and the emptiness of their camp after Joly had been killed. It was the day reserved for lovers, and while he didn't technically have a lover to share the day with, there was someone he wanted to see quite badly.

He'd said goodbye to Marius and Cosette and Max and promised that he would be back in an hour or so, and with any food he could find for them. There was no more to it besides a quick wave before he disappeared down the stairs to the first floor. He knew Cindy's plans with the elevators, and while he was desperate to see her and bask in her presence, he wasn't going to risk her dropping down on him. Just in case.

Once he was downstairs, he set about looking for her. It was too much to hope that she would be where he'd found her last time, but he searched there anyway. He had his folding knife on him, along with a sharpened dinosaur bone, just in case he had to defend himself. He hoped he wouldn't have to. All he wanted was to see Cindy.

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She's killed two people this past week and a half. Cindy knows she's good at what she does; she's a spy. Death comes with the territory. That didn't mean she liked it. It had to be done, she did it, and she's not going to do what some serial killers might do, with that whole taking trophies or doing it slow.

No, she had to forget about it now. Forget about that, and concentrate on what needed to be done. She recently got a sponsor gift of food and water, and it was being used to the extreme. Deciding on the diorama section on the second floor, she took a seat. She'd picked up a harpoon along the way, which got propped up nearby, if needed.

But she needed some time out of the elevators. Just a little, and while she hadn't seen anyone yet, she knew she was making enough noise for someone to hear, if they were close enough. Hence, the harpoon if she's attacked.

Having come up empty on floor one, he headed up to the second floor, taking a route he'd never tried before. It was a risk, as he was entirely unfamiliar with any modifications to the exhibit halls over the last few weeks, but curiosity ultimately and always won out with him. He entered the hall quietly, light on his feet like a cat, passing little dioramas on either side of him until he reached a corner. And just on the other side? It was someone making a fair bit of noise.

Courfeyrac winced, suddenly wishing he had something more substantial to fight with that a folding knife and a bone whittled into a dagger. If it was someone big, someone dangerous, he'd just sealed his own fate. But if it were someone friendly... perhaps he had a chance of slipping away. He decided to turn around and head back to the dinosaur hall, where it was safer.

He was about to do just that when he lost his battle with chronic curiosity again. He craned his neck around the corner to see who was making the noises when she was suddenly illuminated to him. It was like a burst of light was surrounding her. She was like amber and he was like some foolish mosquito stuck on her forever. How lucky he was to have found her, considering how dire the situation in the Arena had become. Another day, another hour even, and he might be dead and gone. At least fate had allowed him this simple opportunity to say hello.

"Cindy!" He called out to her from a healthy distance. He could see the harpoon quite plainly now. "It is me, Courfeyrac. I wish to see you. May I see you, Cindy?"

The noise had been both a deterrent and an invitation. Someone is here and they could be big! Or someone is here, I can hear them, I'm going to get close and kill them. She'd been prepared for any case, and having to not try to be as stealthy as possible, it really was more relaxing.

The noise of someone else around her had her going for the harpoon, getting up on your knees and looking around. But it was the sound of her name, spoken in a very familiar way, that made her jump and look around.

"Courfeyacc?" Cindy laughed, shaking her head and lower the harpoon a little. "What are you doing here, did you decide to try and cram all the information you would ever need?" Getting up from the floor, she waved her hand.

"Come on over. It's good to see you again. I hadn't heard your name, so I was hoping you were still around!"

He was grinning like a fool, abandoning all pretenses that he was being sneaky or sly as he appeared at her side. He was keenly aware of just how reckless he was being but he could not bring himself to care. She could have impaled him with her harpoon right then and there and he likely would not have noticed.

"I would not abandon you so early on." Courfeyrac said, extending a hand to her in a most friendly manner. "We've hardly had any time to visit with each other at all. And besides that, it is Saint Valentine's Day today."

"Good. I really would be sad if I didn't get to see you at least another time before this whole thing is over." Thank god she hadn't just rushed and used the harpoon before thinking about it. There was at least one person who she didn't want to skewer here. It would have been awful for that to happen, even accidentally.

In the past now, and she comes over, letting the harpoon rest against the wall and taking his hand. Easy reach, just in case someone came around and it was a sudden fight. Always careful.

"Is it? I lost count of the days, I had no idea." Cindy grinned. "I'm sorry, I didn't get you a card or anything." She laughed.

"I do not expect gifts, especially as I have nothing to offer you except my company." Which, in hindsight, was not nearly ample enough of a present. He should have stopped by the gift shop first, or scrounged up something from their cache of supplies. "Although, I propose to remedy this situation, once we are both alive and well in the Capitol again."

It was risky to chance that they would both be safely returned to the Capitol after their deaths. He'd heard what had happened to Gavroche and others, how they had been killed and never resurrected. Courfeyrac's heart ached at the idea of Cindy dying and never coming back and it ached to think that he might never see her again either. It was a strange turn around from where he'd been not two months before. He'd been content with his lot, safe and cozy in the shroud of death that engulfed him. Now that he'd been living again, things were different.

"Forgive me that I don't know what is customary for this place, but know that I wish to see you when we are reborn. We could go walking. Or to a cafe. Or... I don't know. We could go anywhere you like."

He was cute. Very cute. He's a kind of person she hasn't seen in a very, very long time, which was because these types of men came from a different age then the ones of now. He may be too good for her, really, if she cared to think about it like that.

Nope, actually, not even close to thinking of it like that. It was, in her mind, a foregone conclusion that they both would be returning to the Capitol after they died in the arena. It was there, though, the idea that it might not happen. That this was their last time together. Nope. Can't think like that.

"Come here." Cindy said softly, gesturing to where she was sitting and going to sit down with enough room for him to be there as well. "Customary for this place doesn't really matter much. But I'd love to go out somewhere with you, when we're both out of here." She gave him a smile.

"Maybe I can show you some nice places that you've never been to before? I don't know how much time you had to spend time in the Capitol." By this point, she was definitely grinning. "I'm glad you're here now, though. Really glad."

He joined her without hesitation, sitting down beside her at a distance which would be considered far too informal if they were back in his Paris instead of in the Arena. Not that he minded bending the rules of propriety, especially not for her.

"I expect you will show me all of your favorite places. My only tour guides so far have been Marius and Enjolras, and while I do enjoy libraries, I find that I also desire something a bit more lively."

He was grinning too, feeling at ease with himself again. He knew how to flirt, how to dazzle women, but Cindy was not like the grisettes he'd wooed before. She wasn't some blushing flower, easily scandalized and needing to be coaxed. Oh, no. Cindy was something all her own, and not his typical fare. He wasn't sure if he could actually handle her. And that made her all the more exciting.

Feeling emboldened, he reached for her hand. "You must forgive me, as this will sound utterly stupid, but I was content with my fate before. I had accepted my own demise, and I did not miss being alive at all. But I do not want to die anymore, Cindy. In fact, I think I might want to live forever."

"I can't say much for Marius, since I don't really know him. But Enjolras... yeah, I could see you needing some other places to go to." She would move closer, given the chance, but she didn't want to scare him away with it. Cindy was fully aware of his time period (having gone through it herself), and she wouldn't want to offend anyone.

He made it hard, though. Especially with what he was saying. She understood, yes. You'd have to be blind, deaf, and dumb to not be able to figure out what it was he was saying.

She'd never been this before. "It's not stupid." She took his hand, giving it a squeeze. "There's no shame in wanting to live. I know I prefer it versus the alternative." She turned a little, to be able to face him more.

"Why do you want to live forever?" Asks this slowly, pushing back her hair over one ear.

He watched her with great fascination, as everything she did seemed to be utterly perfect and graceful. Even a movement as benign as tucking her hair behind her ear seemed somehow enchanting, and if he didn't know himself better, he would think he had fallen in love with her. Of course, he hadn't. He never fell in love. He fell in lust, fell in fondness, fell in admiration, but he never fell in love. He wasn't a fool like Marius, after all.

"I've recently recalled something that I had forgotten," he began to explain, suddenly seeming animated as he spoke. "When we were at the barricade and were preparing to be killed, I tried very hard to forget everything besides the cause for which we were dying. I thought only of that act, only of the republic we wished to achieve. I thought of the response of the people to the news of our deaths. I refused to consider the life I was leaving behind. Not myself, not my family, not anyone I cared for."

He paused, then slowly took her hand and drew it towards his lips to give it a gentle kiss.

"I forgot about everything that I loved in life. And when I was awakened in this world after my death, I did not want to remember those things. I think..." His eyes met hers, and for a moment he forgot what he was trying to articulate. Clearing his throat, he continued. "I thought it would cheapen what I had done. But that isn't me. I am not a miserable man. I have always been a happy man. And I long to be happy. And the time we have spent together has made me quite happy."

She watched him kiss her hand in slight fascination. But not surprise. Definitely not surprise. The way he was, the way he acted. He acted like the gentlemen of his time, and Cindy knew men at that time. But he sounded so different. Like something else was going on, and that's where she got confused.

But this was interesting, and to glean this account of someone who had been there... ishe didn't want to miss any word of what he is saying, and in fact seems like she inches a little forward.

"You know that... from what I've come to understand, what you did, it was brave. And noble." And stupid. "And I understand how terrifying it is, to give up your life for something grater then yourself." She smiled. Then, because she could, she leaned in even closer, cupping the side of his face with her free hand.

"You are really a remarkable man." She looked down for a moment, then looked up to meet him with this soft smile. "It's nice to see that, these days."

Edited 2014-02-26 05:11 (UTC)

"I am really not so remarkable. Not at all." He murmured his disagreement, though he was achingly glad for her appraisal. More so than that, he was glad for her encouragement, for her approval. He could be an idiot, he was well aware of this fact, but it was nice that his risk was being rewarded in this small manner.

Courfeyrac found that he was pressing his face to her palm involuntarily. It was a natural response, and he thought it best not to fight it.

"Isn't that what we all want? In the end, don't we all want for our lives, or deaths, to have a meaning?" It almost felt like a violation of their tender moment to continue on with such an unpleasant topic, but then again, Cindy was a modern woman who could handle such questions. It was so refreshing to be able to talk about those kinds of moral questions with someone besides Enjolras and Joly and Marius, and beyond that, it was exciting to get to discuss them with someone who's opinion actually mattered to him. "I have had a death which mattered. Now I wish for a life that will matter as well."

Tilting his head slightly, he gently dragged his stubbly face against her hand again. "We have a lot to do when we get out of here, my dear. It is a pity we must suffer for it first."

They all really were remarkable. Cindy didn't stay long in France at the time the whole revolution was going on (the United States had their own shit to deal with, that needed help at the time), but who couldn't admire someone who believed in something so much that they would lay down their life for it? An idea, not a person. Something that you didn't know if it would even happen.

"Of course you do. Everyone does. If there's something you want to happen, something to devote yourself to, until it's bigger then yourself; then you have a choice." She kept her hand where it was, fingers light in contrast to her palm. "And you made a difficult, and admirable one."

Cindy did admire him for it. She admired Enjolras for his, and even though she didn't know the others, she admired them as well. To be honest with herself, she wasn't sure if she could do it, if the time came.

"Yes, we do." Cindy smiled. "But things have a way of working themselves out." Which was why she leaned in and kissed him. Hypocritical, but she wasn't very good at waiting on some things.

If he'd said he was surprised by her kiss, then he would have been lying. He could sense it coming, the tension between them building until her lips finally pressed to his. For him, there was no moment of pause, no chance to consider what they were doing or whether or not they had an audience. Quite frankly, he didn't care. He'd been hoping she would kiss him since the first day they met.

Using her momentum as a cue, he snuck his arms around her, pulling her toward him in a gentle, yet firm motion. Cindy may have initiated the kiss, but Courfeyrac was going to keep her engaged. There's nothing timid or shy about him, unlike his idiot friends who kiss for the cameras, he knows what he's doing and he knows how to kiss a woman properly.

After awhile (long enough that he's lost track of time entirely), he finally pulls back just enough to catch his breath and crack a cheeky grin. "This is precisely what I was talking about. We should have done this weeks ago."

By the time they pulled back, Cindy had her arms wrapped around him, something she hadn't even noticed. Well, that was different for her, not noticing she was doing something until it happened. Not that she minded in the least. And he seemed pleased enough by all this; Cindy matched his grin.

"Weeks ago? But monsieur, we only met a few weeks ago." Cindy said almost coquettishly, though it's an obvious joke, because she's still smiling. But.. no discussing it. Enough discussion, because she wants to have this moment. Her arms wrap a little bit tighter as she leans in closer, voice soft.

"We can go on discussing it, if you want." She breathed out the words. "I could be persuaded."

"I believe I could persuade you in other ways." Courfeyrac said with a low growl in his voice. It was darker than his regular tone, but playful still. He reached to cup her cheek, hand straying to stroke at her blonde hair. It was not that he disliked their conversations. On the contrary, he figured he enjoyed just about everything about Cindy. From her personality to her sense of humor to her absolutely beautiful body, he could not think of a single trait of hers that he disliked. And their discussions were, of course, to die for.

But then again, kissing her seemed like it might be to die for as well. She could have stabbed him in the back right then and there and he would have died in her arms gladly. He might have even thanked her for it.

Tangling his fingers loosely in the ends of her hair, he leaned in to kiss her again, this time deciding that he should be the one to do it. He didn't quite have a name for this peculiar bond between them, but he knew that he liked it and he didn't want it to stop. He especially didn't want it to stop if she kept up with that perfect smile or if she kept meeting his gaze with those big blue eyes.

He closed his eyes as he kissed her, and this time, as he pulled away, he bit gently on her lower lip. If she'd really been as coquettish as her smile indicated, he'd never have done such a thing. But he knew Cindy wouldn't be scandalized if he pressed her for more.

She had no doubt that he could persuade her in other ways besides his words. Which were very persuadable in themselves, of course. All of these Frenchies who keep showing up, say what you will about them, they had the power of speech on their side. Cindy knew plenty of people who had that power, but she wasn't one of them.

And she didn't have to be, to get by. And she got by. But this wasn't just 'getting by'. It was something different, and different for her. Something that she might have thought on, if his lips weren't against hers. Feeling his hands in her hair, she treated it as slow and sensual, as it should be, eyes slowly closing.

Until he bit her lip, and she opened her eyes again, bright with laughter that couldn't be done, and she pushed back into it. She was never going to be able to play the passive partner; it just wasn't her style. She had to watch out for being too aggressive, but the way his hair felt between her fingers felt so good.

The positioning didn't work for her. She kept the kiss, even as she pushed him back a bit, following him, of course. Once he was seated better, it helped her to be able to climb into his lap. She held onto the back of his head, running her fingers through it lightly, as she deepened the kiss.

Now this turn of events was mildly surprising. He hadn't expected her to be passive, but her eagerness and force was unexpected and delighting. Courfeyrac was used to being the aggressor. He was a cat on the prowl and he was used to hunting and chasing his prey. To find himself suddenly on the more... submissive side of things was a unique angle for him to play, and he found that it was exciting. He didn't at all mind letting her take control. His pride wouldn't get in the way. Not yet, at least.

He urged her closer then, unwilling to break away from her for anything, not even to breathe. One hand was still tangled in Cindy's hair, the other had found it's way down her body, boldly settling onto her hip and lower back. She seemed comfortably perched in his lap and he was going to ensure that she stayed there, for awhile anyway, until he'd kissed her enough times to make up for the past several weeks of wanting to and not.

His lips left hers then, only so he could kiss her jaw, her throat, nipping at her gently and mumbling something quietly in French. "When we get out of this place, when we are somewhere else, I am going to make love to you. I regret nothing."

She'd been controlled too much by men who's only hold over her was the fact that they were royalty, and she had only married into it. They wanted to be in control, and you rarely saw a Queen on a throne, back in the Homelands. Getting out of there was liberating. She could do what she wanted, when she wanted, with no expectations to anything.

Courfeyrac had expectations that she happily met, if only because they were the exact same as hers. He wanted her. She wanted him. They were in the arena, so some things would obviously not fly. But a little make out session was perfect.

"Mm." She hummed out a soft sound as his lips met her neck, fingers running through his hair, massaging the back of his head. It was the words, though. She heard the words (should she let him know she knows French?) and a shiver ran through her. A shiver, a real shiver, something that made her warm, and wishing they were anywhere else.

God, she did like a guy with words. "I can't wait to get out of here. There is so much I want from you." Cindy tilted her head back, waiting a moment before closing her eyes. She hoped the cameras were getting all of this.

He'd forgotten about the cameras, quite conveniently, instead thinking solely with his body and heart. If there was one thing he'd missed about being alive, it was this sort of intimacy with another person. Feeling someone else's breath and lips and skin made him feel human. His friends had lofty visions of how humanity worked and how beautiful the world could be. Courfeyrac's perceptions hinged on individual connections.

This connection seemed especially beautiful. He found himself groaning against Cindy's throat as her fingers scraped against his scalp and all he could think about was how alive she made him feel. He wanted her so badly. And he wanted her to want him. And he wanted her to kiss him again... amongst other things.

He nipped at her jaw again, then kissed his way back to her mouth. His hands, which had been wrapped around her, moved more freely along the curves of her body. Cindy felt so soft and alive. The weight of her in his lap was almost enough to make him mad.

"Anywhere but here," he murmured between kisses. "Patience." That was almost a joke coming from him, and an obvious one at that. But Courfeyrac didn't care. Their moment was real now. Whatever the feeling between them was, it was palpable and honest and he didn't give a damn if the world knew about it. "I will do whatever you want."

Patience. It made her laugh against his lips, but more out of delight, not maliciousness. It was an obvious joke, and it required an honest laugh. One she was very happy to give. It was really going to be something when they got out of the arena, wasn't it. Cindy didn't know what that something would be, but she was excited to find out.

He'd do whatever she wanted. "Patience." Cindy repeated, lowering her head so they lay forehead to forehead. They could just look at each other, her own blue eyes meeting his. This was more intimate then anything they'd done; intimate for them. It was just them, right here and now, as they looked into each others' eyes.

The Capitol couldn't touch this, and she smiled. "Once we're out of here, I'll show you what I want." Her hands slid the rest of the way down his head, massaging his shoulders. Strong shoulders, she distantly noted for later.

"For now we'll just..." She moved her head again, lips against his ear. "Do what is proper?" A wicked tone to it, though. Very, very wicked indeed.

He very nearly drowned in her eyes, they were so perfectly blue. He'd fallen in love before, several times, and more often than that, he'd fallen under a woman's spell, but this moment between the pair of them was strange and different and quite unlike anything he'd felt in... ever, really. Was she aware of the power she held over him? Courfeyrac was certain she must be, otherwise she would not have made such a show of tempting and teasing him that way.

"My darling, you have a way of making the proper thing seem absolutely unbearable," he exhaled, pulling her against him so that their bodies were pressed even more closely together. He knew instantly that that had been a poor decision, and he found that the heat of her body only served to cause a heightened tension between them. "Come now, if you do not get out of my lap right now, all of our hard fought patience will be for naught." Translation: if she stayed in his lap, things would progress past the point of no return. In the Arena. Before the cameras. Live for the world to see.

He did kiss her again, however, not quite ready to end their moment just yet. As their lips met, there was a sound from the distance. At first, it was static, then came a clear, piercing announcement of the afternoon's casualties. Courfeyrac knew he should stop kissing Cindy and listen to the names of the dead, but he was rather caught up in the moment. That is, until he heard two names which made him stop suddenly and very nearly gave him a heart attack.

Marius Pontmercy. Cosette Pontmercy. Both dead.

"No--!" He gasped, dark eyes growing blacker with grief. What a selfish, horrible fool he'd been. He seemed to shrink away from Cindy, coughing on his words. "Did you hear that? Did they say Marius and--?"

She was already getting out of his lap by the time the names were sad over the speakers. Oh god. She knew the names. Hell, she knew the best man, of course she knew the names. So she was leaning back on her heels, looking at him.

"Marius and Cosette." Cindy repeated softly. "I heard it, too." Goddamnit. She never wished anything like that to anyone. But she also did not know that he was here when we should have been with them.

Maybe if she knew, it'd be different. But god, she wasn't the best at grief. She reached out, taking his hand gently and putting a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

"It's going to be okay. I'm so sorry about your friends."

He wanted to sink in on himself, collapse and fall apart and simply grieve, but he knew he couldn't. He'd pledged his life to protect Cosette's and he'd failed her and failed his best friend in the process. Even though he wanted to believe they would be reborn in the Capitol, he couldn't shake the fear that they would be lost forever.

What was he to say? What could he do now? This time spent with Cindy had potentially damned the others, and like an idiot he hadn't even considered them until it was too late. "I've killed them," he finally said, biting on his lip so that he could try to maintain some composure. He wasn't entirely successful. "Forgive me, my dear, but I should not have come. They..."

He tore his eyes from the ground, from the arbitrary fixed spot where he'd been staring in an effort to keep himself together. His gaze met hers and regret twisted up inside of him. "I did not hear the third name. That means she is alive. She might need me." He started to stand, unsteady on his feet. "Keep safe, for my sake."

"Wait." Cindy placed both of her hands on each side of his face once they were both standing up, to hold him so he can meet her gaze. "Their killer, killed them. Remember that, because things are going to be much more different after we get through this."

She was staring deep into his eyes, willing him to understand. "Go and find her. Make sure she's safe. I can take care of myself." She leaned in and kissed him again, before pulling back and giving him his space. Too many allies in the arena at one time... a mistake, in her opinion, but it worked for some.

Except this time.

Her kiss was warm and comforting, and if rage and horror and sorrow weren't controlling him, he would have happily stayed close to her, kissing her and basking in her presence. Courfeyrac couldn't even let himself think about the future and how things had changed and would continue to change between the two of them. The only future he could consider now was Max's.

He took hold of her hand for a brief moment, squeezing it before turning to leave her. "I will see you soon, Cindy. Until then."

And with that, he departed her little encampment and disappeared the way he came, through the tangled maze of the museum.

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I stole and burnt your soul

I should go to bed BUT NO THIS NEEDS DOING :3

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