It’s not a choice anymore, not for Sam - or at least not one he has to waste time making here. He’s already made it, a long time ago. Probably longer than when he first admitted it, if he’s being honest with himself.
He’d sworn to all of the family he had left here - and some of the ones that’re gone - that he was in this war for good. Because of Porrim, and Bucky, he’d gotten himself just as invested in the outcome of this world as if it were his own. He’d promised them that this fight was his, just like he’d promised the other natives of this world in his support groups. That they were all in this together, that he’d never leave them before the war was over. And the war sure as hell isn’t done with, even if they’ve passed a point where it maybe feels like they can see the end.
But it’s more than that. Even if the war was over. When he’d told Albert he planned on leaving, that was when he thought Jet and Albert were going back home, when he thought he could take Kurloz and Terezi with him. Before a victor who’d forgotten how to smile looked at him with hope and stole his heart, before he held his partner close and confessed that he didn’t know where home was anymore.
He knows now. Home is with Jet, the only one who gets flying the way he does, who understands what the sky means to him. Home is with Albert, who knows him better than Sam’d ever planned, who calls Sam on his shit and opens up to him in a way that reminds Sam to do the same. Home is Kurloz, in all the things they promised each other and all the ways they’ve brought each other back from the edge, the way he knows without saying that they’re in this for the long haul. Home is with Terezi, his little sister who he isn’t willing to lose again, and with Porrim, when his love for her overwhelms the guilt he feels that it isn’t the right kind. Home is Clint, his partner until the end, whose heart beats in the same rhythm as Sam’s and who Sam knows he could never let go. Home is with Steve and Bucky, and it’s thoughts of them that hold him back the most, but not enough to change his decision, as his eyes sweep over the line and find the rest of his family.
Home is the man reaching out to him, the gleam of gold and green on one of his fingers a reminder that Sam doesn’t need of the promise he made him. He’d told Bucky a long time ago that the only future he wanted was one with him in it, and that hasn’t changed.
His hand curls around Bucky’s, fingers lacing together at the same time as he reaches blindly out behind him. His wings spread out, as though shielding the two closest to him, as he squeezes Bucky’s hand in reassurance.
I’m not going anywhere.
With that he looks to his other side, knowing exactly who he’ll see, a silent question in his mind.
no subject
He’d sworn to all of the family he had left here - and some of the ones that’re gone - that he was in this war for good. Because of Porrim, and Bucky, he’d gotten himself just as invested in the outcome of this world as if it were his own. He’d promised them that this fight was his, just like he’d promised the other natives of this world in his support groups. That they were all in this together, that he’d never leave them before the war was over. And the war sure as hell isn’t done with, even if they’ve passed a point where it maybe feels like they can see the end.
But it’s more than that. Even if the war was over. When he’d told Albert he planned on leaving, that was when he thought Jet and Albert were going back home, when he thought he could take Kurloz and Terezi with him. Before a victor who’d forgotten how to smile looked at him with hope and stole his heart, before he held his partner close and confessed that he didn’t know where home was anymore.
He knows now. Home is with Jet, the only one who gets flying the way he does, who understands what the sky means to him. Home is with Albert, who knows him better than Sam’d ever planned, who calls Sam on his shit and opens up to him in a way that reminds Sam to do the same. Home is Kurloz, in all the things they promised each other and all the ways they’ve brought each other back from the edge, the way he knows without saying that they’re in this for the long haul. Home is with Terezi, his little sister who he isn’t willing to lose again, and with Porrim, when his love for her overwhelms the guilt he feels that it isn’t the right kind. Home is Clint, his partner until the end, whose heart beats in the same rhythm as Sam’s and who Sam knows he could never let go. Home is with Steve and Bucky, and it’s thoughts of them that hold him back the most, but not enough to change his decision, as his eyes sweep over the line and find the rest of his family.
Home is the man reaching out to him, the gleam of gold and green on one of his fingers a reminder that Sam doesn’t need of the promise he made him. He’d told Bucky a long time ago that the only future he wanted was one with him in it, and that hasn’t changed.
His hand curls around Bucky’s, fingers lacing together at the same time as he reaches blindly out behind him. His wings spread out, as though shielding the two closest to him, as he squeezes Bucky’s hand in reassurance.
I’m not going anywhere.
With that he looks to his other side, knowing exactly who he’ll see, a silent question in his mind.
You still with me?