"Help?" He doesn't try to puzzle through that, that help would be the first concept to come to Firo's mind. He just shakes his head and explains as best he can. "Help doesn't matter. What matters- Eddie. And Susannah. Even Oy. And Ja-"
His mouth, his mind, stumbles over the word. Over the name. Something in him doesn't want to say that name but he tries saying it again, anyway. "Jake. My son. Jake. Jake Chambers. Eddie Dean. Susannah Dean. We traveled together, I taught them everything. Everything there was time or reason to teach. Eddie drove me crazy, that part never changed, he always drove me to the very limits of my patience. Past them. He knew me for what I was, always. Followed me anyway. He made me laugh."
"Susannah - She was kind. Thoughtful. Patient. Didn't take any shit, but she was patient. She'd have to be. She and Eddie were a good match. A fine match. Eddie sometimes seemed afraid to come close to me when I wept. Something about his world, I think. Like yours. Susannah never was. She was quicker than he was, too, a little. Quicker on the draw. Never liked to admit how natural it came but she knew how to harness those parts of her, aye, and use them."
"There's one other, one more I'd remember to you. I've told you his name. Told you who he was- What he was, anyway." Roland swallows. Then he does it again. Then he speaks on something else, something different. It's for Firo's sake. Firo might still be concerned. "Generalities. If you're still concerned about helping. The generalities come easier. Those tend to be the same, easier to think on. It's the details that crowd in on me. Do you understand? It must be very strange for you to watch. It's the memories. Too many of them. I don't suppose it's possible to explain to you just what that's like, holding too many lifetimes inside of a single mind."
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His mouth, his mind, stumbles over the word. Over the name. Something in him doesn't want to say that name but he tries saying it again, anyway. "Jake. My son. Jake. Jake Chambers. Eddie Dean. Susannah Dean. We traveled together, I taught them everything. Everything there was time or reason to teach. Eddie drove me crazy, that part never changed, he always drove me to the very limits of my patience. Past them. He knew me for what I was, always. Followed me anyway. He made me laugh."
"Susannah - She was kind. Thoughtful. Patient. Didn't take any shit, but she was patient. She'd have to be. She and Eddie were a good match. A fine match. Eddie sometimes seemed afraid to come close to me when I wept. Something about his world, I think. Like yours. Susannah never was. She was quicker than he was, too, a little. Quicker on the draw. Never liked to admit how natural it came but she knew how to harness those parts of her, aye, and use them."
"There's one other, one more I'd remember to you. I've told you his name. Told you who he was- What he was, anyway." Roland swallows. Then he does it again. Then he speaks on something else, something different. It's for Firo's sake. Firo might still be concerned. "Generalities. If you're still concerned about helping. The generalities come easier. Those tend to be the same, easier to think on. It's the details that crowd in on me. Do you understand? It must be very strange for you to watch. It's the memories. Too many of them. I don't suppose it's possible to explain to you just what that's like, holding too many lifetimes inside of a single mind."