Howard was not expecting an embrace, or even much of a response. He was anticipating that he and Sigma would sit there, shuddering in the cold, sopping, side by side like two parts of a Russian nesting doll. But he wasn't expecting Sigma to pull away.
"Sigma...?" Sigma barely even looks at Howard, and Howard's seen that look in the faces of many FAYZ kids before, in his own eyes when he watched the tapes of the Games. Sigma's looking for an exit, and as Howard opens his mouth to question why the cough in Sigma's throat makes it painfully clear.
The pieces fall into place in Howard's mind and crash like tectonic plates. He did this. He got Sigma sick. And now Sigma wants nothing to do with him.
A normal person might not make those leaps in logic so quickly. A normal person might suspend judgment until they've asked a bit more. But Howard's not merely a normal person, but a walking compilation of neuroses, a Greatest Hits of abuse and abandonment. And his senses are keen enough to find even the most fleeting shadows of loss.
He's not stunned, as he stays seated in the rain, right where he is except for the shivering. You can't be stunned by something you've always expected, deep down. But he is stung by it, and so he just sits there, mouth slightly open and clogged with a hundred words he can't say, tears starting to mix with rain.
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"Sigma...?" Sigma barely even looks at Howard, and Howard's seen that look in the faces of many FAYZ kids before, in his own eyes when he watched the tapes of the Games. Sigma's looking for an exit, and as Howard opens his mouth to question why the cough in Sigma's throat makes it painfully clear.
The pieces fall into place in Howard's mind and crash like tectonic plates. He did this. He got Sigma sick. And now Sigma wants nothing to do with him.
A normal person might not make those leaps in logic so quickly. A normal person might suspend judgment until they've asked a bit more. But Howard's not merely a normal person, but a walking compilation of neuroses, a Greatest Hits of abuse and abandonment. And his senses are keen enough to find even the most fleeting shadows of loss.
He's not stunned, as he stays seated in the rain, right where he is except for the shivering. You can't be stunned by something you've always expected, deep down. But he is stung by it, and so he just sits there, mouth slightly open and clogged with a hundred words he can't say, tears starting to mix with rain.